collateraldamaging | Duplicity Inbox

Someone told me you and I, or at least a version of me that was here before, were a thing. Could we get coffee?

Another version of you, maybe.
That tends to be how it goes.

Are you a dom?

Yup. Is that a problem?

No, it's necessary if you want to go somewhere without additional escort.
I'm uncontracted at the moment and presume you've only just arrived.

Wherever you like, then.

Riiight right right. Do I have to come get you or something? I don't know. A bar in the Down. Or tea. Tea would be nice.

I'm in the up already.
So is the best tea shop I know.

Honestea 📍

Perfect, I'll be there in 10

[Luckily, Akihiro had prioritized buying some clothes earlier that day and, more importantly, shoes. No more walking through the half-frozen slush barefoot.

And, if all of this goes horrifically, at least he now knows where to go for tea.

The place is pretty quiet when he gets there, with only a few customers scattered throughout. The rich, familiar aroma is immediately calming. Tea was a good call.

He waits patiently for a staff member to come help him.] Can I get a table for two?

[ This might as well happen, Kazu figures. If nothing else it gets him away from his keepers for awhile, out of the house and from under their concerned gazes. He can talk to someone that won't soften their voice like he's an animal in pain they're desperately trying not to spook.

It's a little worrying that he's not sure who it could be... but that also makes it easier. Whoever mentioned his name could have been mistaken, and this is just him going for tea with a new arrival. That... might be good. And Tim agrees when he explains, so Kazu freshens up and heads out to Honestea. The weather's certainly right for it, a damp cold that sinks into his bones and calls for warm drinks.

He enters the shop and pauses on the mat to tap the slush off his boots, glancing around to see if he recognizes any of the customers. The walk over was more than 10 minutes, so in theory the person he's here for should be--

--oh no.

Kazu's eyes go wide as he sees someone he not only didn't expect, but might be the least prepared for not remembering him right now. Fuck. And Akihiro will be able to smell the grief on him, god fucking damnit. This is what he gets for not asking who the new arrival was... the urge to flee rises and Kazu takes a slow breath in. Holds it. Lets it back out even slower, because he's already here and he's not running out on Aki. Any Aki.

Fuck his everything, though. Squaring his shoulders, Kazu approaches the familiar face seated by the back windows. ]

Hello... you were waiting for someone?

[He gives the stranger a once over. He's handsome and he's pretty sure this is who he's supposed to be meeting. He gets up to properly greet the man.]

Yeah. Iida? Or, I guess, I probably called you Kazu, right? [He finds himself wishing he could remember. Anything. Anything at all. But there's nothing. No recognition.

He clears his throat and motions to the table.] Sit down. Please. I ordered a pot of green tea. Help yourself to a cup. [He reclaims his seat, still watching Kazu with clear curiosity.]

Mm, I prefer Kazu.

[ He inclines his head politely, avoiding both a direct answer and eye contact for a little longer. Just hearing Aki's voice again... it has tension thrumming in his chest as he slips out of his coat and takes a seat. ]

May I call you Akihiro?

Alright then.

[He catches those bittersweet undertones. It's a complex mix of scents, which is understandable.

What he hadn't expected was the misplaced guilt he feels. As if it's anything but this place that's caused this hurt.]

Yeah, that's fine. [He fills the slightly awkward silence by sipping on his tea.

Finally, he sighs.] Where to start?

[ Kazu pours himself a cup and sets the pot back down, making sure his hands are steady before looking at Aki properly. Aesthetically, he's the same. But it's also obvious that he's not the man Kazu knew. Something in his expression? His voice? Hmm. ]

Did you have a reason for wanting to meet me? Maybe there. [ Wait. ] Or... I do have something I could ask.

[He slips his hands under the table, out of view, and squeezes his wrist with his other hand, digging his fingers in.]

I want to know how much you know about me. How long did we know one another? What sort of things did I share with you?

[He lets go of his wrist.] Go ahead.

How accurate could my answers be, though..? We were friends for nearly a year, but proportionately that is less of your life than mine. I only know what he told me, not what he didn't.

[ It's not Kazu refusing to tell him what he knows, just warning that it might be hard to do concisely. There's also a lot Kazu wouldn't want to discuss in a tea shop... he'll ask his question first, anyway. ]

Did you expect me to recognize your username?

[The muscle in his jaw flexes as he clenches his teeth.] What did he tell you? [His voice is carefully level but the avoidance clearly has him on edge.] I- [He stops himself for a moment, regaining his composure.] I need to know what he told you about himself. Do you know about my family? My... childhood? How much did he tell you? Please.

[While a stranger likely wouldn't see the signs, to someone who knows him well -knew him well- he's clearly distraught.

Kazu's question catches him off guard though and he gives him a puzzled look.] Yeah? Why wouldn't you? Most people call me Daken.

[ ...oh. The stress is very obvious to Kazu, yes, whose expression softens with understanding as he realizes what Aki must be so worried about. It would actually be pretty funny to the Akihiro he knew, Kazu suspects. His Aki would know utterly unnecessary that worry is.

This one doesn't.

The ache in his chest turns sharp and twists when his own question is answered, too. Kazu has to take another steadying breath at this point, so as to not draw attention to them. He's good at that externally, but Akihiro will smell the (probably confusing) protective anger simmering inside him now. ]

I certainly didn't. [ Caaaaaaalm down, Kazu. Try again. ] He never told-- well, he never really knew what to do with how offended I'd get on his behalf. [ Kazu lowers his voice, wrapping both hands around his delicate tea cup to focus on the heat. ] I know about your family. I knew some of them directly, too, even though I doubt Logan and Laura are who you're asking about.

[ His eyes meet this Akihiro's, dark and serious. ]

He did tell me a lot you probably wish I didn't know, I'm sorry. Your childhood, Romulus, and a lot of things you didn't deserve. Not the lies, not how other mutants treated you, not what you had to do to survive. But I've never repeated even this much to anyone before so if that's the concern, I am not one. We'd argue sometimes because...

[ That last trails off into a pause, Kazu's jaw working uncomfortably as he hesitates... then glances down and takes a sip of tea instead. ]

I will not cause you any trouble.

[He switches briefly to Japanese, going out on a limb and assuming Kazu can understand him. Understands what daken means.] I'm not surprised. [He can smell the indignation.] I liked it. I liked taking it from them. If I used it, it couldn't be used against me. They wanted to call me a rapid dog, a mongrel, then I'd be one for them.

[It's why he still keeps the name. Some part of it feels like it gives him power. But, Kazu is right, it doesn't change that he was called that growing up. He switches back to English, speaking softly.]

No... actually, I did mean Logan and Laura. [In a way, he still does think of his adoptive father as family, but other than that... no. He didn't consider anyone else from his past family.

Romulus' name gets a visceral reaction as it feels like the floor is dropped out from under him. He nearly maintains a neutral expression but his eyes betray him, the haunted look in them. He still hasn't been able to shake that man. He can't imagine why he'd told him all of that.

But he gets hung up on one thing. When he speaks, it's quiet, hardly above a whisper, only a tinge bitter.] Didn't deserve? ...Arguable. [But then Kazu does mention arguing and it piques his curiosity.] Because?

[ Kazu has actually been speaking Japanese this whole time, despite being fluent in English. He's fluent in several languages but doesn't tend to switch between them without reason -- whatever translation accommodates them here is even better than the MR tech his world utilized. It just feels safer for him to speak in his native language, with how often he already puts his foot in his mouth.

The explanation of why he still uses Daken earns Akihiro a grim nod of understanding. Kazu can very much relate to that; he'd worn the problem label he was given as a badge of honor himself, like he was proud of how much everybody hated him... it wasn't entirely a mask, and probably isn't for Aki either. But he gets why the man he met here three years ago never brought it up. ]

They've been gone awhile too. The versions I knew. [ Maybe it was a mistake bringing names up? Kazu rubs his thumb over the handle of his cup, a subtle nervous fidget. It had seemed important for Akihiro to have concrete details, markers in the vast landscape of his history. Kazu has no way of knowing how much he wasn't told, after all. He just wishes he hasn't put that haunted look back in Aki's eyes.

This really isn't a conversation he's comfortable having here, but they're tucked in the back corner of the shop. Kazu's voice is just a murmur now, since he knows Akihiro can hear him fine and no one else needs to. ]

That is what we argued. Whether or not some part of you was or is inherently the monster they treated you as didn't matter to me. Everything I learned about him, everything he told me he'd done or experienced... just made me more impressed by the person I knew. And I think sometimes, he did want me to blame him.

The versions of them. [He nods, lips pressing into a thin line for a moment.] That's something that's going to take some getting used to, I think. I ran into... [He pauses, but ends up sighing, not really sure what else to call the person he'd come across.]-a Logan. It clearly wasn't the one I know.

[He's aware Kazu likely knew about his strained relationship with his father. Strained, but they were both trying and things were slowly improving. Kazu would also likely be able to easily pick up from Akihiro's tone and body language that things had not gone well with the Logan he'd met when he'd arrived. He can't help but feel conflicted and a little tinge of guilt thinking about it.

Hearing about what they'd argued about makes him exhale softly, just shy of laughter. Well, there's no doubt in his mind now that whatever version of him was here before was very, very similar to him. It's a little strange too. Like he's an imposter, gossiping about himself with someone.] You're probably right.

[He's quiet a moment before he finishes his tea and unhurriedly reaches for the pot to pour himself a little more.] I... I think, I'd like to know what you want to do now. About you and I. I would understand if you'd rather I kept my distance. I'm sure speaking to me when I don't remember you is like reopening an old wound. If I were in your shoes, I'm not sure I'd want to start over. We could leave it here. Now that we've spoken, I feel confident that you won't share what I told you with anyone.

And, well, if you did, you know what I'm capable of. [It's a terrible joke and delivered even worse. His heart just wasn't in it though. So, he adds a quiet.] Kidding. [Just so this poor guy doesn't think he's lurking around the next corner to kill him.]

It's surprised me the past few years, just how much a person can get used to. More than I thought.

[ Whether that's good or bad isn't so simple to determine. Neither is if he's glad they do seem to be understanding each other easily this time around too -- is he cheating? This isn't fair, surely.

Then that little huff of almost-laughter from Aki makes him ache again, but in an almost pleasant way. Like soreness from a good spar or reminiscing over a fond memory. Kazu has missed the sound of Akihiro's voice, all complexities aside. And at 'we could leave it here' his head snaps up sharply, searching the other man's expression. ]

...no, that's-- not what this feels like. [ A little furrow appears between his brows. ] It isn't starting over, either. I don't really have a precedent for this, but I know I wouldn't want you to avoid me?

Mm... isn't that usually the way of it? [It's always impressive how much a person could get used to by simply continuing to endure.

He raises an eyebrow.] No? I guess it probably is a little different for you. The me you met... sounds like me. I don't know if I just don't remember or maybe... I've been told people arrive from different times along the same timeline. [A future him, perhaps?

He tilts his head a little and gives Kazu a soft smile.] Alright. Good. I think, I'd like to get to know you.

No one has better taste than me, after all. [He gives him a smirk, feeling slightly more relaxed about this whole thing. It's still unnerving half-knowing what this man knows about him. All his dirty little secrets. But if he'd trusted him enough to tell him, that had to mean something.] Would you like to split another pot?

I think it should be my turn now. What was your life like back home? Any super human abilities I should be aware of?

The same person coming here repeatedly from different points in the timeline is a lot more common than from a different universe entirely, in my experience. [ Kazu shrugs one shoulder, his smile back hesitant but relieved. ] Either way I would also still like to know this you.

[ It's bound to hurt a little, but Kazu has gone into every relationship here with the understanding that nothing can last. This Akihiro might not remember or might not be the same person at all... and Kazu already feels lighter realizing that either way he still wants to be here. Or wherever.

He nods decisively. They should get another pot. ]

No superhuman abilities, but back home I was a military experiment that's about as close as you can get in my world. Think mecha pilot, but the pilot also is the machine.

Well, seems like you have a head start. [Like he'd said, nothing that Kazu had told him sounded wrong or out of place. He assumes that Kazu would've commented on it if he looked drastically different as well. So, he's likely right. Same timeline, different time.

He spots the waitress and makes eye contact, snagging her attention so he can order another pot of tea.]

Voluntary experiment? Or involuntary?

[Akihiro gives him a quizzical look. The man isn't a machine. He can smell him, hear his heart.] Machine how? Did you have one those? A mech?

[ Kazu pauses for the waitress to reach them so Akihito can order them, considering his words. His opinions of the project have changed over time. ]

It was an involuntary reassignment, top secret, and we could decide whether to participate on arrival. Of course 'no' wasn't really an option all things considered... but thinking about it now they couldn't have forced us. Not back then. Not before we'd uploaded.

[ And not while Dr Weller was alive and in charge to protect them, but how it all went to hell is too hard to explain right now. Kazu lifts a hand to tap his forehead instead. ]

Only your mind goes into combat. I was on the front lines of a war that neither humans or drones could fight for about a year and a half.

Involuntarily reassigned and the voluntold you were going to participate? Or, I guess, volun-subtly-threatened.

[He tops up both their cups, holding his to let the hot tea warm his fingers as he listens.] Do you regret doing it? Now that you know they couldn't have forced you.

Huh. That sounds pretty cool actually. [He not so subtly lets his eyes wander over Kazu's body.] You look like you can fight though. Hobby? We ever spar?

text; un: daken

text; un: shogun

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